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Sunday, December 14, 2008

Road Trip!

Between our daughter being sick in the hospital and the fact we hadn't seen our granddaughter yet, we decided it was time for a road trip to Arizona! So we loaded all but one of the four boys into the van and headed out first thing in the morning Friday.

Our first stop was to visit our daughter who by that time was out of the hospital and seemingly doing well. This was the first time she had seen Austin in 21 months.

You can definitely see a resemblance! I am not sure he knew who she was, but there did seem to be some form of recognition or familiarity.

We were really nervous about this visit as it was bound to be a bit uncomfortable for all, but it actually went fairly well.

Next, we were off for the highlight of our trip, to meet our granddaughter who my dear friend has been caring for during all of this.

My friend has done a wonderful job with Autumn, she has been well cared for and very much loved!

Autumn is so teeny tiny that at first even my husband was very afraid to hold her, but that didn't last long!They (or should I say Grandpa) spent a good while napping on the sofa recovering from our long yet rushed drive.

I still can hardly believe I am grandma of two now, although one of them is more of a son than grandchild to me.

I have to be honest here and say while this was a wonderful trip in so many ways, getting to see my daughter after nearly two years, and meeting my granddaughter for the first time, it was also hard. The lines of family relationships are so blurred and confused, it makes it difficult on all, but I fear as the years progress it will be hardest on Austin.

Who is mom? Who is brother, sister, etc..? Here is this lady who I think is mom and who I now even call mommy, but why does she keep calling herself Grandma, and why only to me? Who is this other lady who seems only somewhat familiar, who keeps calling herself mommy? Why do they keep calling my brothers uncle? I don't get it..

And now here we are introducing him to yet one more person, and trying to explain this is his sister. He thought she was pretty neat, but he certainly didn't want to share his grandma(or mommy???) with her!

I all it was a good trip even though overwhelmingly emotional at times and brings even more concern and worry about what the future may bring for all.

It was great to see my friend again and her family. Even though the families have only met one other time, when we got together it was like we've known each other forever and had only been apart for days rather than the long months it has been. It didn't take the kids long at all to become familiar again!

Before you knew it they were playing games, rough housing, and just being plain old silly! They had a great time! We are all looking forward to a possible visit from them just after Christmas. They are such a warm and welcoming family and really special to me. I feel so blessed that through interesting circumstances my life has been enriched by this special family in so many ways. I don't know if I can ever thank them enough for caring for my granddaughter during this difficult time.

We also have to thank a special aunt and other family members who helped make this trip possible. Had it not been for their help we would not have been able to meet our precious granddaughter and try to take those first difficult steps in trying to restore a relationship with our daughter and build one between her and her son.


Leslie said...

That's precious, Tara! Glad you were able to make the trip.

Jan said...

Dear Tara,
It's been a while since I've surfed around and visited "old" friends. School and life take up so much time now that I rarely have extra moments to blog and catch up on others' lives.
Your road trip sounded wonderful and exhausting at the same time. And, I agree, your son/grandson will have lots to figure out as he grows older and begins to have bigger questions. But, I have faith that God is able to do "more than we can ask or imagine", even in this situation. Praying that you continue to cling to the hope that He gives us for our futures. And, thank God, literally, that His plans are so much wiser and better than ours.
Blessings! Jan

Katybeth said...

I prayed for this trip!
I'm so glad it went well!!!!!
And the pictures of Austin over the baby are adorable!!!!
I'll keep praying for you guys!
Can't wait to visit! though it will probably be after our little buddle comes along!